Tech Support
Dear Tech Support:
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0
and noticed a slow down in the performance of the flower
and jewelry applications that had operated flawlessly
under the Boyfriend 5.0 system.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many
other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.9, but installed
undesirable programs such as NFL 7.4, NBA 3.2 and NHL
4.1. Conversation 8.0 also no longer runs and Housecleaning
2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging
5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I
do?
Signed,
Desperate
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Dear Desperate:
First, keep in mind that Boyfriend 5.0 was
an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating
system. Try to enter the command C:/I THOUGHT YOU LOVED
ME and install Tears 6.2. Husband 1.0 should then automatically
run the applications: Guilt 3.3 and Flowers 7.5.
But remember, overuse can cause Husband
1.0 to default to such background applications as Grumpy
Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Please remember
that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will create SnoringLoudly.WAV
files. DO NOT install Mother-In-Law 1.0 or reinstall another
Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications
and will crash Husband 1.0.
It could also potentially cause Husband
1.0 to default to the program: Girlfriend 9.2, which runs
in the background and has been known to introduce potentially
serious viruses into the Operating System.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program,
but it does have a limited memory and can't learn new
applications quickly. You might consider buying additional
software to enhance his system performance. I personally
recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Single Malt Scotch 4.5 combined
with such applications as Boob Job 3.6D and that old standby...Lingerie
6.9 (which have both been credited with improved performance
of his hardware).
Good Luck,
Tech Support
