TOPIC 1 - How to Fill Up the Ice Cube Trays. Step by step, with slide presentations.

TOPIC 2 - The Toilet Paper Roll: Do They Grow on the Holders? Round table discussion.

TOPIC 3 - Is it Possible to Urinate Using the Technique of Lifting the Seat Up and Avoiding the Floors/Walls and Nearby Bathtub? Group practice.

TOPIC 4 - Fundamental Differences Between the Laundry Hamper and the Floor. Pictures and explanatory graphics.

TOPIC 5 - The After-Dinner Dishes and Silverware: Can They Levitate and Fly into the Kitchen Sink? Examples on video.

TOPIC 6 - Loss of Identity: Losing the Remote to Your Significant Other. Help line support and support groups.

TOPIC 7 - Learning How to Find Things, Starting With Looking in the Right Place Instead of Turning the House Upside Down While Screaming. Open forum.

TOPIC 8 - Health Watch: Bringing Her Flowers is NOT Harmful to Your Health. Graphics and audio tape.

TOPIC 9 - Real Men Ask for Directions When Lost. Real life testimonials.

TOPIC 10 - Is It Genetically Impossible to Sit Quietly as She Parallel Parks? Driving simulation.

TOPIC 11 - Learning to Live: Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife. On-line class and role playing.

TOPIC 12 - How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion. Relaxation exercises, meditation, and breathing techniques.

TOPIC 13 - How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy: Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries, Other Important Dates, and Calling When You're Going to be late. Cerebral shock therapy sessions offered.

* Upon completion of the course, diplomas will be issued to the few survivors.